Do you suck at conflict and what can you do about it? – Patrick Aylward | episode 24 recap


Do you suck at conflict? Some people are always embroiled in it, others are running away from it, but I think that most of us can admit that we don’t really know how to handle it well.

That’s what led me to this next conversation with former trial attorney and Canadian litigation attorney Patrick Aylward. Patrick spent most of his career in high tension, high stakes environment where he became a “fixer”, a person brought in to deal with situations when parties were locked into conflict.

It’s on the back of this experience that Patrick has gone on to create his own framework for dealing with, “conflict”. Patrick is passionate about the point that he believes that traditional conflict mediation and negotiation has failed us, he said that it typically results in a zero-sum game and that almost always, a certain party comes off short. This style of conflict resolution tends to see the issue prolonged as both parties are hyper-vigilant and with a highly emotionally charged environment, nobody wants to bend or to be perceived as “giving in.”

After being in the conflict management game for so long, Patrick realized that we were going about this all wrong, from disagreements in the home, workplace challenges to major litigation and disputes, he believed that there was a much more effective path that we could take to help us better align with one another towards a more positive outcome.

This was the birth of the Collaborative Path. In his book, he outlines a clear framework on how people can work together more effectively through the reframing of the “conflict”. This doesn’t mean that there isn’t an acknowledgement of the ugly truth and the facts, but with this recognition and more productive approach, we can work towards a quicker, cordial, and much more equitable outcome for all those involved.

The Collaborative Path is a great read and framework for anyone that finds they are in situations often where consensus is required, but the possibility for conflict is high, this really is anyone that is running a business or a family for that matter!

Enjoy folks!

RJ Singh

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